Back Pocket

Why is it that when we are sad, we look for that one person who will make us feel better for the moment? There is always that one you know you can call even when you shouldn't. They would jump at any chance to be with you. You on the other hand, have no intention what so ever of being with them. They are just simply someone that you like to keep in your back pocket. Only for those moments you do not want to be alone, need something fixed, a favor performed or a moment to feel fulfilled/satisfied. For you, this is a perfect deal and person to have around. For the other, it is a devastating cycle they for some reason cannot get out of. Is it because they are in denial? I always hear and say "Denial is a strong thing." It could also be, they just hope one day you will realize they are the one for you. The one that will make everything better. After all, it has been this long they have been sort of doing it. Why not invest in them full time. Give back a little. Maybe it is because we truly know deep in our hearts, there is no way it could be. It is just not meant to be between the two of you. If only we could actually be honest and just tell them the real deal. Why don't we? Are we afraid of losing that one? If so then Why?...

Goals and Expectations

When we start a new adventure in our lives; whether it is moving to a new place, beginning anew, or just simply taking on a new endeavor. We sometimes are saddened when our hopes and aspirations do not live up to our expectations. Thinking everything will be perfect. That life could not get any better after this; there is no way anything could go wrong. The fact of the matter is, we are sometimes naive. Naive to the fact that life will always have obstacles. There will always be something or someone in our way. The only thing we can really do about it is tough it up. Be a grown up and just stick it out. Always do your best and never give up on your dreams and aspirations. Those goals that you set in the beginning will be achieved. So what if it is not done in the timing set for yourself. Not everything goes our way. Stay confident and focus on completing those goals. When they are finally completed. The challenge it took to get there will make your succession that much more incredible.

Connecting

Have you ever thought there is a reason you do not truly connect with someone? A relationship that is totally on the surface on your part. Maybe it is because you feel that you are not worthy...? A feeling of superiority? Why is that? We give our all as we like to think to each person we get involved with. Once we take a step back, we realize...Maybe it is us and not the others for the reason of it not working out. After all, there has to be some fault on your part. Otherwise, there would still be one of them around in the first place. We all feel that others have not been through what we have been through. Once we actually open up. We find there are others with similar experiences. We find that there is someone we can actually connect with.

Everything

What moves you? I heard a song today that literally moved me. It was not the first time i heard this song. Each time i hear it, nothing else matters. 'Everything' by Lifehouse...An incredible song about love. Truly being in the moment and actually being In Love with someone. The point to where you are truly balanced. Although there is still a storm or issues going on in your life. Just having that one person with you, makes you feel you can take on anything. It is sort of like having a personal boost without actually having it. That one person you meet and become involved with. They 'Complete your life'. They are everything you want. At some point the want you have for them in your life, actually begins to become a mixture of want and need. There is nothing like it. An indescribable feeling.

Be Like That

Have you ever been out somewhere or watched an episode of a show? After that moment you felt that you would almost give anything to be in those shoes. Just thinking that if you could be like that you would be perfectly, incandescently, content with life. You would give anything to live just one day, one moment in those shoes...The thing about that is, there are other factors in the life of the person being idolized that you may not want or like when experienced personally. There are many who only want the good things in life without the bad or the struggle/work it takes to actually achieve them. What appreciation would we have for anything if there was no work or effort put into it. There simply would be no end result. There would only be. This I think would actually would make one feel unfulfilled. Why not put effort into everything you do. Strive to be who ever you idolize, but in your own way. After all if we were all the same life would be pretty dull.

Fillers

Have you ever met someone and felt and instant connection? That feeling that you two should be together and you really cannot understand why it has been this long to finally meet one another...The other day i was feeling this way. What does it mean when you are genuinely interested in someone you know you could never really be with. Why is it that we get these types of feelings? This got me thinking. The relationships we have with others are sometimes fillers. Those moments where you are completely happy being single but have those moments where you need a stand in for select occasions. Those moments where a friend is just ok, but to show up with a significant other is great. Why not just have a friend pose as a partner. Is it because we miss that intimate connection? Those moments where you can actually have someone there...As i have said before. Love is Tricky and life is only the same.

One Day At a Time

The other day while at my favorite local cafe relaxing and people watching. I saw an incredible older couple. They looked so happy and into one another, like it was their first week of dating. In speaking with them, the two phrases that stuck with me were: "Never go to bed angry or unhappy with your spouse" and "Always just take it one day at a time." The first phrase i have heard a countless number of times. The second i have only begun to hear more frequently from others. This got me thinking...When we meet someone that makes us feel incredible and happy with life. We should just take it one day at time. So what if it does not work out. At least you know there was no over analyzing and you just lived. What is most important is not that the two of you "Lived Happily Ever After." The main importance is that the two of you Lived...

Knowing Someone

The holidays have recently passed by. This was a time where a majority of people couple up, in order to not be alone at such a wonderful time of the year. I have met a few people that were together, but gave off the feeling they did not really know one another. Have you ever been in a relationship or dating someone that you did not know at all. This got me thinking...Why not slow it down, take a step back, and just truly get to know someone before diving head first. When it comes to matters of the heart, it is always tricky. You cannot really be "In Love" with someone if you do not truly know them. You can always care or just love someone they do not really know, but I do not believe you can really be "In Love" without truly knowing them.

To have someone that really knows you. Inside and out, the good and the embarrassing. There is not comfort like that. To have someone that in a way needs you in their life. There is no drug like that. To be alone and truly content with your life. That is truly indescribable.

Take me As I am

The other night I had dinner with the most incredible, insightful and comfortable woman i have met in a long time. Our conversation was non-stop and so easy. Of course we got around to my favorite topic...Matters of the heart.

Have you ever met someone who is so imperfect yet so perfect at the same time. I have met a select few where i have thought this. Some are in the most incredible relationships, while others are happily single. "Take Me As I Am" a great phrase and powerful statement. There are so many people out there who try to change for another person. Why is that? I know we all want to love and be loved in return...Does it have to be at the cost of losing one self. To not be able to be yourself is a tragedy. It is a feeling of not truly being comfortable around others. Not matter who we meet in life, friends or lovers. One should always keep this phrase in mind. If they cannot accept that, then they are not meant to be in your life in the first place.

"Own It"

Have you ever asked someone what they like or love to do? They sit back and hesitate with their answer, because it is a little embarrassing...Why not say what you like and just "own it". There is nothing wrong with owning up to what you like to do or what you love in life. The thing is that if people realized that once they owned their life...they would realize how much others are like YEAH!!!! that's cool. There is nothing more incredible than meeting someone that is confident in themselves. Truly just being OK with who and what they are. What they like and what they do in their lives. I have met many people who i would not really agree with them in what they do, but because they "own it," i am like Hellz yeah YOU are AWESOME. This is because confidence is very attractive and a great quality to have in a friend or relationship...

Only with Laughter Can You Win

Live, Love, Laugh....Three words that mean so much. To truly live is an incredible thing. To truly Love is indescribable. To Laugh means you are Living and Loving at the same time. What is life without laughter. Some of the greatest times of my life are from the moments where i have literally done nothing but laugh randomly all day. On my Pandora today i came across this song by Rosie Thomas and it seriously stuck with me. To meet someone if even for a moment and have them truly come into your life...Indescribable. Even if it is for one night. One's life could truly be changed forever.



"You and me, me and you
There's so much that we've been through,
Through it all Ive come to understand Gods love.
And if tomorrow never comes
Know this twice, just know this once.
Knowing you has made me able to go on.
You and me, me and you
There couldn't be a better two,
To be blessed and know the meaning of true love.
And if you leave me I feel scared,
Fall apart so unprepared.
But I dare to make it trough all on my own.
Yes I dare to make it trough on my own." By Rosie Thomas

Advice

Why is it that those who give the greatest advice, do not take their own? A friend of mine who gives excellent advice always has a different set for their own issues. This got me thinking...The greatest psychologist and psychiatrist out there always have someone else they seek out for advice and to vent to. Is it that we realize what we are telling others and just need reassurance or are we just too stubborn to take our own advice. I for one know that i must remind myself at times to take my own advice. There are many situations where when you see them or are told about them the result or opinion is clear. When we are actually in the situation the opinion is totally different. As a friend of mine says "But we are in Love." Yes, at the moment everything seems to be going great, but after you two come to a realization and break up...There is always a moment in hind sight where one says, "You know he/she was right"

Too Soon

I have an interesting story...Now I am curious if anyone is as taken back as me when i first heard it.

Two people go on a date with one another. They have a great time and connect really well. Everything is going so well, that one party invites the other to a party with them that very night. Mind you it is New Years Eve so why not drink and be merry. Both parties get pretty wasted and pass out. Now here is the surprising part. One wakes up to the other guy giving him a blow job. Now before you start thinking what i know you are all thinking. BUT....It's the FIRST DATE!!!! I could see if the two were dating for a while, but they are not. Needless to say the two have not had a second date.

This got me thinking, when is it too soon to give it up? Sometimes it is totally ok to "Put Out" on a first date. The key thing is that it should be a mutual feeling and totally consensual. I myself have been on many dates. A few I have "put out" on the first date and they turned out to be great relationships. Others turned out to be just a few weeks of crazy sex that I thought was dating and turning into a relationship at the time. In hind sight i realize it was the ladder. A personal note to self is to wait until the feeling is right and you see your life with the other person in the future. Whether it is the near future or further. I guess this is sort of a tricky question because every situation is different and no one is the same. I have many married friends that are happily together for a few years and definitely "put out" right away. The key though as all have agreed upon...It should be totally consensual and both parties need to be conscious at the time. I agree because I mean how can you really enjoy something if you cannot recall it happening...

The Right One and Independence

Looking for the one...The right one. The one we think will make our lives perfect and complete. At times this happens too soon and makes us realize, what we thought we wanted is not what we really want or need. Even the most independent people secretly are looking for "The Right One." The reality is that once we find the one person we feel completes our life, sometimes it makes us realize the timing is not right. A relationship where one is taking care of the other and the world just simply could not get any better. One day we sometimes realize that a sense independence is necessary in order for us to truly appreciate and realize who we want and/or need in our lives. A relationship may end because of this, but both parties may actually need this in order to grow in their own lives separately. Life is always a never ending journey. Sometimes with with complications but never the less a journey.

Remember Me

We all would like to be remembered in life. For something great, big or small. I just watched the movie "Remember Me" and as the first time i saw it. It brought tears to my eyes. A great film about relationships big and small. A great quote from the movie..."Whatever you do in life will be insignificant, but it's very important that you do it. Because nobody else will. Like when someone comes into your life and half of you says you're nowhere near ready, but the other half says: make her yours forever." This got me thinking. One should always take that chance. It is possible that the turn out will be less than positive, but on the flip side something great can come of it.

न्यू इयर न्यू बेगिनिंग्स

It is the start of a new year. I am planning to keep up with my blog this year and write much more often. It has been a little over a year since i have written and have so much in my brain to jot down.

Single

Why is it that when we are in a relationship for a period of time and it ends. With the next few who come along we jump in so fast. Instead of starting from the beginning again, we jump right in the middle and skip all of that. Is it because we are so afraid of being single and alone. Sometimes we need to be terrified and single in order to really appreciate the good ones who do come along...Maybe then we realize that being single is not so terrifying..

Open up

Why is that we feel so much more comfortable writing down our thoughts instead of expressing them? When we feel we have something to say, instead of actually speaking up and revealing what is on one's mind we write. Being expressive verbally is such an incredible release. It frees one of any regrets, what if's, etc...Opening up is hard sometimes but necessary to truly reveal who you are

Growing up

As we get older we learn & develop a few things in life...Those people you thought would be there forever all of a sudden are not. We become more self reliant and aware of life. The real world truly hits us. Time starts to fly by. etc...During this transition period it is truly important to stay strong, never give up and just see it through. There could be something great ahead waiting on the other side...

He's Just Not that Into You

So, I just finished watching He's Just Not That Into you...This got me thinking...Every relationship we are in, no matter how alike it may seem from the last is so different in a way that we learn what not to or what to do the next time. Sure you get hurt, cry, sometimes blame yourself, but it's all for a reason. Maybe there was some fault on your part. There are after all two parties involved. The thing is, if you feel in anyway that the other person is not feeling you then let it go. The other thing you can do is just bite the bullet and ask what's up. Nothing wrong with some blunt honesty. I personally admire & respect those who are. So many people obsess so much about what the other is thinking, when it really could be as simple as just asking or taking the lead yourself...

Confirmed

Today my flight and itinerary have been confirmed for my potential jump start of my career in Cali...This got me thinking. When we are given such a great string of opportunities, how do we know that we are making the right choice. People say "always follow your gut", others say "follow your heart." When it really comes down to it, the best thing to do is to evaluate everything. How you see yourself in this new place? Is this what you really want? Are you really ready for this and are you willing to take such a chance on life? No one can really answer these questions for you, nor can anyone make the final decision but you...

Life, Work & Relationships

Why is it that when we finally feel we have met the one person that could be the one you can spend your life with, a once in a life time opportunity comes up...Making a choice and taking a chance on love, or jump starting a career that could potentially be obscenely lucrative. The ability to not have to make a choice and do both would be amazing. Although, that simply would not be realistic and such is life. Sometimes it is possible to have it all early in life without a struggle. But that is a rarity. To those who are able to do so, I say God bless them and hope they realize how blessed they are.

Lately

Lately i have been thinking....When we carry ourselves with pride, dress well, are well groomed, speak clearly and properly....why does that instantly mean one is snobby or stuck up. Not everyone who takes care of themselves and truly enjoys life feels they are better than anyone else. If anything one feels elated to b..

Snow Day

It's snowing outside and I was thinking. Today is literally a perfect day to stay in, snuggle up under some covers, have some bobsled brownie ice cream and just relax. Looking outside I think to myself...The world is truly beautiful and every season literally has something really great, different and interesting to offer.

Break Ups

Why is it that when people break up they try to remain friends immediately after it all went down. There is no time for one to stand back and take a look at the bigger picture. Think back and realize why this one did not work out, what can be learned from this experience, etc...Even when all seems ok on the surface. One party could be truly hurting on the inside

Holidays

During the holidays some people get caught up. Caught up in shopping and buying gifts for all, in finding that someone, if just for the holidays so they will not be alone at this time. The holidays should be a relaxing time. Time to reflect. What can be changed for the better. What stays the same. What new and exciting...